This morning in class, one of my students sarcastically asked where dinosaurs fit into the New Testament. Improvising, I said that God actually hadn’t created dinosaurs yet and they were actually only going to be around in the end times. The reason there are fossils is that time is a circle and it’s already looped back around — the future dinosaurs died, then their bones remained in the ground for the loop-around.
This was coming off a class break, so students were kind of still filtering in, and someone asked where I was getting these ideas. I just pointed at my Bible and said, “Have you guys even been READING this stuff?!”
Sadly, one person looked so confused that I had to explicitly say I was kidding.